November 28, 2006

Is Your Safety Net Your Dragnet?   Have you ever held on to something for way too long because you were afraid to take the plunge into the unknown?  You kept playing it safe even though you knew that now was the time to make a change.   You just weren't quite ready to take the leap.  "It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new.  But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful.  There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power," says Alan Cohen.   Playing it safe does leave you powerless.  You've given in to having security verses having the life you want.  Your safety net has become your dragnet.  Yes, it drags you down, sucks your energy and power, and becomes a hindrance to you living your full life.  You never are able to realize your dreams because you're playing it safe.    What keeps you playing safe?  For many, it is the uncertainty of the change and the fear of the unknown that drives you to stay in the status quo.  Other reasons are you: fear failure, conflict, and rejection have a need for certainty don't trust yourself are unwilling to accept negative consequences of your actions have low self-esteem like the attention you get from others as they watch you wallow in self-pity are in denial there is a problem are satisfied to be dissatisfied   But, what if you are dissatisfied with being dissatisfied and are ready to take the plunge?  The pain of hanging on to your safety net is greater than the pain of releasing it.  Your safety net has become your dragnet.  When you embrace this as the truth, you will be able to move forward.   How do you get started?  Answer these questions: What is keeping me from taking the plunge?  What are my reasons? What is the worst possible thing that could happen to me if I gave up my safety net? What is the best possible thing that could happen to me if I gave up my safety net? What will my life be like if I remain in my status quo? How will my life be when I am living my dream?   Surround yourself with people who will support you in your quest for the best. They will encourage you and be there for you through thick and thin.  Walk through your fear to the other side.  Visualize your success, step by step.  Pick yourself up as you stumble and carry on.  Keep your dream in sight.   Remove the safety net that has become your dragnet and you'll find yourself energized.  You will stand in your own power with more self-confidence and you will find new strengths within.  You'll gain new perspectives and experience growth you've only dreamed about.    What could you accomplish if you gave up your safety net?          "Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing." Helen Keller   "Too many people are thinking of security instead of opportunity.  They seem more afraid of life than death."             James F. Byrnes   "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do.  So throw off the bowlines.  Sail away from the safe harbor.  Catch the trade winds in your sails.  Explore.  Dream.  Discover."             Mark Twain   "Uncertainty is the only certainty there is, and knowing how to live with insecurity is the only security."             John Allen Paulos         I was fortunate the other week to meet Darren LaCroix at a Toastmasters District Conference.  Darren's dream was to be a stand up comedian.  His debut in 1992 was disastrous, but he forged on. His day job was working for Bose stereo.  His nights were spent working the comedy clubs.  Nine long years after his disastrous comedy debut, Darren finally quit his day job and became a full-time speaker and comedian. He had taken to heart the message his friend Brad Cramer had been telling him for years:  "Darren, your safety net (Bose) has become your dragnet!"  Ouch!   On August 25, 2001 out of 25,000 contestants from 14 countries, he was crowned the World Champion of Public Speaking.  Against all odds, Darren achieved his dream.  He now travels the world speaking about his inspirational journey from first-rate chump to first-class champ, proving anything is possible if you're willing to work for it.  Check out Darren's website at www.humor411.com   I was captivated by his message.  I kept asking myself how many times I played it safe in life and not gone out on a limb.  The answer was too many.  Yet, I have stretched myself and said "yes" multiple times.  It's all about going after my dreams.   They won't just appear out of thin air; I must release my safety net.  Darren was the messenger and I heard the message loud and clear.   Speaking of Toastmasters, I received the Competent Toastmaster (now the Competent Communicator) award a few weeks ago.  It has been a great learning experience for me as I surround myself with awesome speakers.  As President of my local club I also grow as a leader.  I recommend this organization to everyone.  (www.toastmasters.org)   Have a fantastic week and don't let your safety net be your dragnet.   Stephanie   P.S.  Is your study club, organization, or local society looking for a speaker?  I bring my warmth, authenticity, and passion to the stage as I share what it takes to overcome your obstacles to living a more rewarding life.  For more information click here.              We grow by "word-of-email" so please feel free to forward this newsletter to anyone whom you think might benefit from and enjoy it. Thanks so much! Contact Us: stephanie@7steps2abalancedlife.com