October 10, 2006

Deal or No Deal?   "I give up.  I just don't think I can make it." "I'm giving you one more chance to turn around your performance here at the office." "I wonder how far I can succeed if I continue on this path." "That is not acceptable to me. No."   Have you ever spoken those words? Chances are you have.  You wheel and deal with yourself and others numerous times throughout the day.  How's your deal making prowess?  Do you give in too easy, or keep on going?  What do you tell yourself?  What kinds of deals are you making?  Think about it because I am going to ask you: "Deal or No Deal?"...after you read this newsletter.   When you deal you must ask yourself if you are selling yourself short. The dictionary describes a "deal" as a business (or personal) agreement, transaction, or arrangement which usually benefits all the parties involved.  Or does it?  Sometimes, you end up with the short end of the stick when you deal, both personally and professionally.    You can make a deal because you: ·        are lazy and thus take the easy way out ·        don't have the confidence to forge forward ·        don't want to rock the boat ·        make excuses for your actions ·        have always settled for less in your life ·        are afraid of failure ·        are not a risk taker ·        are in denial and fooling yourself ·        don't want to deal with it ·        just don't want to look beneath the surface to figure out what is really going on in that particular situation   Notice that all the statements above come from a position of weakness.  You get what you get when you deal from this place.    On the other hand when you come to a deal from your strengths you: know what you want think big ask the right questions to insure you get there weigh all the options keep tabs on your actions know where you are every step of the way persevere believe in your abilities don't lie to yourself do not put up with those who do not support you in your quest for the best    From this position of strength you know when to take the deal and when not to take it.  You've known from the beginning what it was you were working towards or what you wanted (your goals or outcome).  You know in your heart you've done your best and given it your all and now is the time to make a decision.  You've taken a stand.  Sometimes it is a win-win and other times, it is not.  You can get a bad deal.  That's life.  You learn from your great deals and you learn from your bad deals.  Be mindful of other people's reactions as you deal in life.  You can be reeled in by their comments.  (Watch the audience in the TV show; some are screaming to take the deal and others are shouting "no deal".)  Ultimately, you are responsible for your own actions and your own deals.  You live with the consequences.        "Most of us do much better with agreements that we make with others than with those we make with ourselves."             Chin-Ning   "I have found no greater satisfaction than achieving success through honest dealing and strict adherence to the view that, for you to gain, those you deal with should gain as well."             Alan Greenspan   "There are two parts to influence:  First, influence is powerful; and second, influence is subtle.  You wouldn't let someone push you off course, but you might let someone nudge you off course and not even realize it."             Jim Rohn        I can get caught up in the frenzy of the television program "Deal or No Deal".  I'm telling the person on the screen to take the deal or not take it. Of course, that's easy because the contestant is not gambling with my money. When I ask myself what I would do in the same situation it makes for great conversation with myself!  Should I or shouldn't I take the deal?  It's fun to play along.   I admit I'm not much of a risk taker. Sometimes I do give in too easily, but then I wonder what I'm missing so I have gotten better over the years in saying "no deal".  It's fun to see the situation play out and as I said earlier sometimes it's great and other times, not so great. It's like being on the balance beam.  You never know if you'll get a perfect score or wind up on your tush.  That's life.   Have a fantastic week. You can answer the question now: "Deal or No Deal?"   Stephanie   P.S.  Go St. Louis Cardinals!  Bring it home this year.         We grow by "word-of-email" so please feel free to forward this newsletter to anyone whom you think might benefit from and enjoy it. Thanks so much! Contact Us: stephanie@7steps2abalancedlife.com